13 Dec An emotionally-fluid man
I’ve been focussed on men’s work for over 30 years. But some of the strongest input I’ve had has been from women.
My journey started by studying process psychology, Gestalt therapy and a good swag of other modalities for over a decade. In 1997 I attended an international seminar of process psychology followers in India, accompanied by middle-class men and women. A tough, wise woman told me:” As a white, heterosexual male, you’re not going to learn anything here. Your healing is about developing a trusting relationship with men. Go and find some men.” At that time, I met one of the founders of the Mankind Project, and so began my men’s work.
In December 2000, I did the first New Warrior Training in Australia, at Eagle Heights, Qld. Later, for 10 years, I had the privilege of leading the NWTA all over the world – in the US, Canada, Europe, the UK, Africa and New Zealand as well as here – in addition to representing, as a member of the board of MKP International, all the countries outside the US.
The value to men who come to this work is they get to wake up and be fully alive in their spirit. That makes them somebody others want to be around. – Billy
Now I’m based in the country around Bellingen, where my family has been for six generations. We have been doing annual trainings for the past 12 years since our first Bellingen NWTA in 2008.
What led me to devote myself to this work is that while my father was a generous man, who loved and taught me a lot, there was no little true intimacy between us. I knew I had to do men’s work to create that with my son, Steve. I asked him to do the NWTA, and he did. So over the past 18 or 19 years we’ve developed a close, loving relationship – and today, he is a full leader and we are colleagues in this work. My relationship with my son was the big motivator for me.
The ongoing benefit to me is that I occupy my own being. I’m fully present inside of who I am. I’m a living, breathing, emotionally-fluid man. The value to men who come to this work is they get to wake up and be fully alive in their spirit. That makes them somebody others want to be around.
A woman said to me recently: “You’re too damn mysterious for me.” But I said the way I’ve lived my life is different from what you know. The spirit of the men’s work, the deep connection to the mystery, is what has driven me. And that’s what informs my own life and journey.